I’ve Debated Whether To Publish Articles About Race

I worry that it will appear performative, self-righteous, and validation-seeking

Author’s photo

In truth, had I written about race a few years ago, it would have been all three of those things.

Now? Maybe it will. Maybe it won’t. This endeavor requires a level of vulnerability that scares the crap out of me.

And that’s probably a strong indicator that I need to write about it.

A little voice keeps calling to me to share my hard truths as I’ve unearthed my biases over the past few years. To upgrade my allyship. To move from education to action.

To end my silence. To be honest about my f-up’s — past and present. To share my lessons learned.

The conversations of allyship start with the self, with those tough internal monologues.-Emmanuel Acho, Uncomfortable Conversations With a Black Man

One of the books I’m working through right now is Me and White Supremacy: Combat Racism, Change the World, and Become a Good Ancestor by Layla F. Saad. She has amazing, hard prompts in this book that I’ll share in my future series of posts.

That’s where I’ll start with this writing journey.

Maybe someone like me will read my words and be more open to looking in the mirror and doing their own version of this work. Maybe it’ll plant a seed for them to take on the work at a later time. Maybe it’ll prompt some discussion between family or friends.

I don’t have control over how people respond to my writing but I hope that my articles will prompt other white people to reflect on their experiences and start some tough internal monologues.

Like most people, I’m a good person with good intentions but I’ve also made bad choices fueled by ignorance. I’m trying to make better choices fueled by knowledge.

I will not pretend to be an expert. I will have more questions than answers. I will be brave with my words. I will not use shame as a tool to sway readers, but I won’t shy from acknowledging my own guilt and shame.

As I continue to read, watch, and listen to Black voices — especially women — I’ll pay attention to the words that…