I related to this article so much. My 7-year-old son has ADHD and I grew up in a house where yelling, threats, and shame was used to control behavior. Obey = love.
My little guy gets enough negativity outside of the house. He doesn’t need more of it at home.
Like you, we strive to create a safe, loving space where he can be himself. Do we get irritated and mad at his impulsive decisions and treatment of his brother? Yes. But we try to keep love at the forefront when we discipline, or teach.
It’s so hard because if someone doesn’t have experience taking care of a neurodiverse kiddo, they won’t get it. And we as their parents have to let it go. So much judgment to ignore though.
Thanks for writing this and I hope you get to a good place for you with your dad. That’s got to be so hard for you.